I have made several attempts to write a post in the past few days. My thoughts are too scrambled; even my fingers have difficulty typing the words. I struggle. To put it shortly. I am praying, though. And that alone is keeping me through this. Keeping me from all the darkness in the life of this world. I pray and when I pray, I feel Allah with me.
Right now, I am in such a dark place that it is even hard to feel Allah’s love. To know how much Allah loves me. Sometimes I say to myself, “shame on me” for not feeling Allah’s love. But it is not “shame on me.” It is not. It is all about my mindset and the firmness I feel in my religion. It is about loving myself again.
I have low self-esteem. Right? Don’t know.
All I do know is that I need to feel loved. and I need to accept that love. I need to accept the help that Allah sends to me in whatever shape or form it is in.
I will hesitate to post this post. So I’m going to do it quickly and without thought. Even without a final period to the end of this sentence